Good morning!
If you’ve taken my TODDLER WARS! workshop, see how many principles you can spot in the video before you read on! ❤️
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MAMA TIME
After a crazy weekend, Ella Grace wanted to do puzzles w mama before bed time. Remember how we talked about a child-led connection with lots of laughter?
Spending these few minutes w her, talking about her day, enjoying each other is renewing for the both of us and really helps with overall behavior.
EMPOWER
Notice that as soon as Ella Grace makes a mess on the floor she says “wipe it up”. We don’t make a big fuss of it, she automatically knows that she’s in charge of the mess, that she has a solution for it, and then we move on with not much interruption (threatening, bribing, sharing, etc).
If you do this consistently, if you give them consistent boundaries and trust that they are capable of this expectation, then they will start to do this naturally too because remember? Big picture goals! We want healthy, happy, well-adjusted, responsible little ones!
LEARNING THROUGH PLAY (EXPLORATION)
This is probably the hardest and easiest thing to do as a parent. Sit on your hands but also still engage! We bought this puzzle for her about a week ago (DJECO from Janie & Joe) and at first she really struggled with it. I encouraged her but really had to give her the safe space to make mistakes, give her the opportunity of being so proud of figuring out hard things and a week later, she’s really good at this because instead of making it easy for her when she was frustrated, she had the chance to see what worked and didn’t and how the puzzle fits together.
Also really fun, when she starts to pretend play after building her puzzle! Sometimes, just taking a beat allows them the opportunity to foster their creativity and imagination! I saw a cute puzzle, she saw a chance to be an ice cream vendor, offering a cup or cone, w sprinkles too! 😂❤️
PREP PREP PREP
The last part when I’m asking her to say bye and love you is such an important reminder why prepping is important!
Notice how she thinks I’m leaving and immediately, she is confused and trying to process. Imagine if I wasn’t taking a video but really just needing to head to work or go out after that.
If you do plan on leaving or moving on to something else, always prep! In this case, before we took out the puzzles, I would have reminded her that we would play puzzles then mama had to go to etc etc etc. For us last night it was, 3 puzzles (be specific and hold your boundaries firmly) and then it was time to get ready for bed.
PICK YOUR BATTLES!!
Want to know why her top button is undone? It annoys her when she lies down and she doesn’t like it riding up to her neck so she asks to undo it. Mama picks her battle...so I would rather have her dressed in pajamas w one button undone then nothing on w a screaming child. Because on the grand scheme of things...does it really really matter?
SOAK IT ALL IN
If all else fails, just soak it all in. It goes by so so fast mama, stay calm and confident, believe in your little and yourself, have fun and always always just lead with love. ❤️❤️❤️
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Come join my next Toddler Wars! Workshop by roping in your mama tribe and organizing your own. Message me for details!
